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When Luddites play tag. June 22, 2008

Posted by ourfriendben in gardening, Uncategorized, wit and wisdom.
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Zora at the delightful blog Gardenopolis (one of our faves; see the link on our blogroll at right) tagged Poor Richard’s Almanac yesterday, asking us to write six random things about ourselves and post them on our blog. Since our blog is a joint effort by three of us—our friend Ben, Silence Dogood, and Richard Saunders—this threw us into instant chaos.

Today being Sunday, Richard had come over to Hawk’s Haven, our rural retreat in the scenic middle of nowhere, PA, to have brunch and talk about the week’s upcoming posts. Picture our friend Ben and Richard seated on the deck, surrounded by plants and kittens, listening to the babble of the little creek, Hawk Run, just off the deck. Silence has gone into the kitchen for a coffee refill. Here’s how the scene played out:

Richard Saunders: We need to write a post to respond to Zora’s tag and tell people six random things about ourselves.

Our friend Ben: Uh… right.

RS: Right.

OfB: Right.

Silence returns to the deck with a fresh cup of coffee. Richard and our friend Ben turn towards her with one accord.

Silence: Why are you two staring at me?

OfB: Um, about the tag post…

Silence: What about it?

OfB, RS: We think you should write it.

Silence, glaring at them, then smiling sweetly: Ah. Well, I’m sure I could think of six fascinating things to say about each of you

OfB: Oh, come on, Silence! How hard can it be to come up with six things people might want to know about you?

Silence: Well, you could find out how hard it is by writing the post yourself. Seems like it’s high time one of you two took a turn, unless you want to rename the blog “Poor Silence’s Almanac.”

RS, OfB: Uh…

Silence: Look, why don’t we draw straws. Whoever pulls the short straw has to write six things about themselves.

RS, OfB: You’re kidding, right? You mean people actually draw straws?

Silence (slaps forehead, rolls eyes): Look. I’ll go get three grass stems and cut one in half. You can each draw one, and we’ll see who’s the lucky winner. (She returns with the “straws.”) Gentlemen, take your chances!

OfB: Urk.

Silence: Hah, you’re elected! You pick six or I’ll do it for you! And, please, don’t make one of them that you want to win a MacArthur award. Surely everyone who’s old enough to read has gotten the hint by now.

OfB, glowering: Thank God you’re not one of the nominators.

Silence (smugly): How do you know?

OfB groans, closes eyes. Saints preserve us…

RS, looking desperately at his watch: Er, Silence, Ben, perhaps we could get on with this so we could have a little brunch before suppertime?  

OfB: Okay, okay. (Thinking.) How about these?

1. Despite my huge and much-loved book collection, if I were trapped on a deserted island, I’d rather have a huge stack of blank notebooks and pens than any of them. And if I couldn’t have notebooks and pens, I’d take a stick and write my novels, poems, and essays in the sand, even if I had to start again each day.

2. I’ve never understood the compulsive need for novelty that seems to afflict so many of my friends and acquaintances. I can eat the same food, wear the same clothes, read the same books, see the same movies, listen to the same music, appreciate the same view, enjoy the same people and pets endlessly without craving something new. Where I love I love, be it food or art or companionship. Of course I enjoy new things, too, and adding new favorites to the classic repertoire. But I also remain faithful to the old. The shampoo I used in college is still in my shower; I still watch my favorite movies and read my favorite books every year, and listen to beloved CDs pretty much daily; I could eat pasta or pizza or a baked potato or good bread and cheese or rice every day with a salad and side and be perfectly happy. I never tire of the view from our back deck, or wish I could trade my friends, family, and nearest and dearest for newer models. (Shut up, Silence.) Life is rich, good, and rewarding just as it is, and therein lies the secret of happiness, say I.

RS: Uh, Ben, I think these are supposed to be short “random things,” not paragraphs. Some of Zora’s were, like, three words.

Silence (smirking): No one ever accused Ben of being at a loss for words.

OfB: Grrrrrr. Maybe one of you would like to take over?

Silence: Good idea. Maybe we each should take two. Richard, you’re up!

RS: Okay, short and sweet. Let’s see:  

3. If I won the lottery, I’d buy a horse farm in Lexington, a house on the Battery in Charleston, and a summer retreat in Nova Scotia, or maybe in the Smokies.

4. If I could come back as anyone, I think I’d like to be Daniel Boone. What a life!

RS, OfB: Your turn, Silence!

Silence: Oh, all right. How’s this for short?

5. My favorite dessert is fresh blueberry tart in a shortbread crust with tons of whipped cream.

6. If I won the lottery, I’d buy a big farm and raise endangered livestock breeds.

OfB: Okay, that’s short. I know you bought blueberries at the farmers’ market on Friday. I don’t suppose there’s any hope that a fresh blueberry tart is in the offing?

RS: Yum!!! What Ben said.

Silence: (Heavy sigh.) I suppose the spinach-mushroom crepes and strawberry-citrus salad I was planning just don’t measure up, eh? Maybe I’d better just send you two off for some Egg McMuffins…

RS, OfB, fervently: No, no!!! Crepes and strawberry salad sound wonderful!

Silence: Well, maybe while I’m making them you could finish writing this post. I’ll even throw some blueberries in the salad just for you.

OfB: Oops, that’s right. We’re supposed to list the tagging rules and then choose six other bloggers to tag. (Looks at Richard.) I have some ideas…

RS: Go for it!

OfB: First, here are the rules:

* Link to the person who tagged you.

* Post the rules on your blog.

* Write six random things about yourself.

* Tag six people at the end of your post, linking to their blog.

* Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

* Let the tagger know when your entry is up.

And now (heh, heh, heh) for the taggees:

Silence (reappearing on the deck): Wait, I have some nominees, too! 

RS, OfB: I’ll bet you do!

Silence, OfB: And the nominees are…

1. Meg and Kelly at Future House Farm (http://futurehousefarm.blogspot.com/), ’cause we know you have lots of interesting things to say about yourselves.

2. Sean at Bamboo Geek (http://bamboogeek.blogspot.com/), ’cause between Bamboo Geek and your new blog, Trash Watch, we’re sure you’ll have plenty to share with the rest of us.

3. Michael at Tomato Casual (http://www.tomatocasual.com/), ’cause we know if you post a response on Tomato Casual, all six “random things” will have to be tomato-related, and we think that’s a wonderful challenge.

4. Barbee’ at Barbee’s Blog (http://barbeeslog.blogspot.com/), ’cause we’d like to know more about a passionate gardener from one of our favorite states, Kentucky.

5. Deb at Aunt Debbi’s Garden (http://auntdebbisgarden.blogspot.com/), ’cause we know you’ve been tagged zillions of times but want to challenge you to come up with six more things. C’mon, you can do it!!!

6. Joy at Garden Joy 4 Me (http://gardenjoy4.blogspot.com/), for the same reason as Aunt Debbi. If you’ve run out of things to say about yourself, you could always tell us six random things about Emma! 

Okay, hopefully we’ve fulfilled our tagging obligations, or at least, done our Luddite best. (What’s a Luddite, you ask? No, it’s not some obscure cult. See our post, “What is a Luddite, anyway?” to find out all about it.) Now it’s up to the rest of you guys to carry the torch forward…       



1. zora naki - June 22, 2008

I chortled my way through that post. Thanks for the illuminating insights into each of your delightful characters…

Ha! Glad you enjoyed it, Zora!

2. Daphne Gould - June 22, 2008

LOL that was funny. And there is nothing wrong with long items about yourself. I know when I was tagged a couple of days ago I wrote way too much. Why say it in three words when there is no one stopping you from elaborating, oh yea you had someone stopping you.

Thanks, Daphne! It’s always good to know there are a few of us out there who enjoy writing and reading. Whatever Silence may say about brevity being the soul of wit, I can’t help but point out that wit isn’t everything…–OfB

3. Barbee' - June 22, 2008

Okeydokey, You asked for it. I was innocently enjoying reading through all your fun, when suddenly there was my name!! A bolt out of the blue that made me jump. If you think yours is long, wait till you see mine, ha! It is up and ready for reading (hee, hee, hee). Consider yourselves forewarned, you three. Fun, fun, fun!

Excellent! We’re heading right over!

4. deb - June 22, 2008

How funny. Way to keep them in line Silence. As a twist, I am going to let the monkeys tell you six things about me. That should keep it interesting.

That’ll be priceless, Deb! I can’t wait to see what they say. I just hope they’re not all in detention when it’s over!

5. artistsgarden - June 22, 2008

What a lovely way to respond to the tag.
Great fun

Thanks, Karen! We always have fun when we get together, and we’re delighted when other people enjoy our shenanigans, too!

6. sjones71 - June 23, 2008

ha!!!! This post is a riot. Well done as usual.

Many thanks!!!!

7. Cinj - June 23, 2008

Ha! I like these multiple person blogs, very entertaining. I like the interaction. Did you save me some brunch? That sounds yummy!

I was busy helping Cheesehead build a shed today, boy am I beat. WHEW!

Wow Cinj, a shed?!! Wish we had that kind of skill!!! You certainly deserve to be treated to brunch after that!!!

8. Cinj - June 23, 2008

Hmm, maybe I’ll make Cheesehead treat me to breakfast this morning before we start the floor. I’m feeling lazy today. I wish I could say we’re done, but there’s still a long way to go. I’d say it takes more brawn than skill though!

Good idea! And maybe you all should go out for lunch and get pizza for supper! Between trying to finish the shed and get ready to go on vacation, you have more to deal with than cooking!

9. kate - June 23, 2008

This is the best tag I think I’ve ever read of the 6 random facts. You did good, Silence!

Thanks, Kate! I’m honored!!!

10. Barbee' - June 23, 2008

OFB: I left another reply to your comment on my personal expose’, but knowing you probably won’t get back that way for some while, I have brought it to you.

When you visited Wales on the garden tour, did you visit Bodnant Garden in North Wales? We were there in early spring; the laburnum arch was not leafed out much less blooming, of course, but I was delighted to be able to see its structure and ‘bones’.

Yes, Bodnant is my favorite garden. It’s about the only place I’ve been where I just wanted to move in.

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