Ho, ho… oh, oh!!!

Silence Dogood here. For everyone who overindulged on Christmas, or who hopes to overindulge on New Year’s Eve, I have a few seasonal drink recipes to share, one of which claims to cure a hangover. They’re from a 1965 book by Suzanne Huntley called The Twelve Days of Christmas Cookbook.

The drinks do sound good, but they contain so much alcohol that I have no trouble seeing why the “cure” would be needed after a night of indulgence. Clearly our parents and/or grandparents had no hangups when it came to consuming mass quantities of alcohol. Anyone who thinks Jell-o shots are toxic should try one of these old-time favorites. You, too, will be saying “Ho, ho… oh!!!”

           Buttered Rum

“The delight of New England.” For each serving, place 2 ounces dark rum [we like Gosling Black Seal—Silence], a twist of lemon peel, and a stick of cinnamon in a tankard or mug. Fill with boiling cider or hard cider, add a thin pat of butter, and stir with the cinnamon stick until the butter has melted.

          Vermont Punch

“A mixture of 2 parts whiskey, 2 parts lemon juice, and 1 part maple syrup, served hot, makes a drink that is much better than it sounds.”

            Champagne Punch

2 quarts apple juice, chilled

2 fifths light rum

1 tablespoon Angostura bitters

2 quarts champagne, chilled

Mix all ingredients, pour over a large block of ice in a punch bowl, and serve. [2 quarts champagne?!! Yow.—Silence]

         Whiskey Punch

3 lemons

3 oranges

2 cups granulated sugar

3 cups hot, strong green tea

1 pint brandy

1 quart or more bourbon [!!!!!—Silence]

Grate the rinds of the lemons and oranges into a large bowl. Add the sugar, the juice from the lemons and oranges, and the tea. Let this stand for half an hour or so, then add the brandy and bourbon. Chill and strain out the citrus peel. Taste. It may need a little dilution with water. [You don’t say!—Silence] This punch will keep practically forever if it is bottled and tightly corked.

         Christmas Punch

1 quart cranberry juice

1 fifth Sauterne

1/2 pint brandy

1 lemon, thinly sliced, unpeeled

sugar to taste

1 quart carbonated water 

Mix the juice, wine, brandy, and lemon slices and let stand, covered, for a couple of hours. Now taste, and add sugar if needed. Add the carbonated water just before serving. An especially attractive way to serve this punch is to freeze a large, fancy mold of more cranberry juice and use this instead of plain ice.

Just reading these recipes may give you a hangover. But frankly, the name of the “cure” is enough to give me one! Aaarrgghh, what a nauseating name. Then there are the ingredients. Just give me aspirin, thank you. Nonetheless, the author swears that this recipe will “mitigate” three or four hangovers, so if you can face it, feel free to try it:

             Reindeer Milk

1/4 cup tomato catsup

1 heaping tablespoon onion, chopped

1/4 cup celery tops

1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce

2 cups clam juice

1 cup vodka 

Put the catsup, onion, celery tops and Worcestershire in a blender and puree. Add the clam juice gradually, with the motor running at low speed. Then add the vodka and blend for a second or two. Pour over ice in an Old Fashioned glass and garnish with a lemon wedge.

Eeewww, if that’s not enough to make a teetotaler out of anybody, I don’t know what is. But hmmm, that Christmas punch doesn’t sound all bad…

          ‘Til next time,

                      Silence

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