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Why did God create stinkbugs? April 13, 2011

Posted by ourfriendben in wit and wisdom.
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Yes, folks, it’s wacky blog search time once again here at Poor Richard’s Almanac. Here’s the latest crop of search-engine phrases that desperate readers have used to find our blog, may God preserve them. As always, the search phrase in bold, our comments following. Enjoy!

why did god create stinkbugs: To punish people who don’t capitalize His name.

use spoon to dish out: Frankly, we find words or fists more effective. But there was that scene in “Robin Hood” where the Sheriff of Nottingham threatened to cut out someone’s heart with a spoon…

no pain no gain silas dogood: That would be “Silence” Dogood. And no doubt she’d be happy to inflict plenty of pain on anyone who says otherwise.

when did Hans Sloane invent chocolate: Um, that would have been the Aztecs. Sir Hans invented hot chocolate with milk, setting the stage for the milk chocolate bars we know and love today.

gouvenor morris urinary: Spare us the details, please. And that’s “Gouvernor” Morris.

frisee how to prounance in french: Free-ZAY. But before you tackle another language, you might want to learn how to spell English words like “pronounce.”

worms coming in sliding glass door: Sounds like you have the makings of the greatest critter-based horror movie since “The Birds.” Too bad Hitchcock and Ed Wood are dead.

That’s it for this batch! Stay tuned for more atrocities and amusements, coming soon to a blog near you…

Comments»

1. the Manic Gardener - April 14, 2011

Too funny. You have to wonder what some of these people hoped to find.
–Kate

Thanks, Kate! I think maybe it’s best not to inquire too closely about what these folks were thinking…


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