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Simply salacious. September 5, 2011

Posted by ourfriendben in wit and wisdom.
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Silence Dogood here. Do you know that the word “salacious,” which has come to mean sexy, titillating, dirty, derives from salt? Just like salty language, language interspersed with colorful cursewords, four-letter words, and naughty (not to say coarsely sexual) allusions. In both cases, the point is that, just as salt adds savor to food, salty language adds a certain savory spice to life.

Since these concepts originated, reflecting the essential benefit of salt to life itself, the enormous value placed on salt by all ancient societies (“worth his salt,” “the salt of the earth”), the very concept of salt has acquired such negative connotations that God forbid you should even bring it up in polite society, much less ask for salt in restaurants or at anyone’s home. Don’t we all know that salt is the Great Satan, spiking high blood pressure?

Well, no. Those of us with low blood pressure who relish our salt, and plenty of it, have seen no increase in our bp levels. We think that, like eggs, salt has been blamed for ailments that are in fact unconnected with it. And apparently, recent research bears us out.

“Doubt peppers debate on salt, ” an article in our local paper, the Allentown, PA Morning Call (www.themorningcall.com), said this: “Recent scientific papers suggest the basis for a global crackdown on salt is not what you’d call rock solid. Two 2011 studies indicate that the evidence is inconclusive, or that reducing salt may even be harmful.”

So there, health police! I’ll raise my salt shaker to you as I pity you for passing up the food enhancer that has instinctively been sought by all creatures since we first emerged from our birthplace in the saline ocean. Borrowing a Biblical allusion, our salt has recently lost its savor thanks to health Nazis. Thank God for researchers who have continued to look into the issue. It’s worth bearing in mind that the Biblical reference points out that this is the worst thing that could possibly happen.

Please pass the salt.

              ‘Til next time,





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